Glancing at the statistics, one might say that the cost of caregiving is an equal opportunity burden. It can affect any family – and when it does, the impact on working men and women – no matter what their profession – is likely to be profound.

That’s the conclusion we drew as we read this recent article from the Wall Street Journal describing the situation faced by a large group of American families. The article, written by reporter Clare Ansberry, describes how an estimated 29 million workers, white collar and blue collar and everything in between, are caring for an adult family member while trying to hold down a regular job at the same time. The burden – financial, psychological, and physical – is a heavy one.

Let’s dive deeper into the Wall Street Journal report before asking Rajiv to weigh in on this important and timely topic. (Note that a subscription may be required to access the Wall Street Journal report.)

Cost of Caregiving: Bearing the Burden of Two Jobs

Tens of millions of Americans are straining under the burden of two jobs, Ansberry tells us: the work they’re paid to do, and the task of providing care for older family members.

“The double shift can come at a career cost,” she writes. “Caregivers who are also working full time report turning down promotions or seeking less-demanding assignments. Some switch companies, or say they’ve had to choose care duties over their careers. “

For example, there’s Rich Bueler, a sales manager with a 37-year career, who retired early a few years back. He had the money to do so, but more important, he felt the need to take care of his aging parents. He couldn’t perform his demanding job while also being flexible enough to be available for his mom and dad.

“I threw up my hands,” he says. “I wasn’t mad. I was discouraged and disappointed.” 

Caregiving Demands Grow as People Live Longer

The numbers are fairly startling. Ansberry writes, “An estimated 29 million workers, from senior managers to retail clerks, work while also caring for an adult family member, according to research by AARP and the National Alliance for Caregiving. Six out of 10 are working full time, compared with 46 percent in 2009. After working 40 hours, many spend about 20 hours providing unpaid care, according to the research.”

The demand for this kind of care is growing, largely because people with chronic illnesses are living longer. Falls and unexpected diagnoses can lead to hospital stays and months of treatment and therapy after. Moreover, the desire to age at home is also a factor, requiring help from friends and family members to become reality.

“There is No Off Switch” for a Caregiver

To make matters worse, most companies don’t recognize the burden that caregivers have. “Company benefits often don’t include senior or eldercare support, such as paid time off or reimbursed care, or accommodate those exhausted by caring for a person in failing health,” Ansberry writes.

Some caregivers find themselves pulled into their boss’s office to talk about their performance, and others report never using their vacation days for an actual vacation. “My work doesn’t stop,” says Kim Moser, manager of a research lab at the University of Oklahoma while also caring for her mother-in-law, 83. “There is no off switch.” 

(Ansberry provides more of Moser’s story which we have trimmed for brevity. Those interested should see the conclusion of the full article for more.)

No Corporate Benefits for the Family Caregiver

Ansberry brings us back to sales manager Rich Bueler of Ballwin, Missouri. Now 65, he noticed two years ago that his parents were declining in both memory and mobility and needed more help. “They lived close by, so he would come over a few times a week to help fill pill containers, get them to doctors’ appointments and take them to the grocery store, outings that could consume several hours,” Ansberry writes.

Bueler checked his corporate benefits online and discovered nothing related to eldercare. When he spoke to the human resources department, they told him that the only benefit available was the Family and Medical Leave Act. While this act is required to be offered to employees by law, it didn’t fit Bueler’s needs, because his parents did not require daily assistance.

“[Bueler] asked his manager if there was a more flexible position that would employ his skills but require less-frequent customer and partner meetings,” Ansberry writes. “He says he was advised to search the company’s job board for postings.” That was the extent of the help.

Reality of Caregiving Creates Tension at Work

The topic of caregiving can be a tense one between employers and employees. Some bosses might assume that a caregiving worker is also a distracted worker, or will be more likely to miss deadlines or take unexpected time off.

“Federal laws provide limited protection from discrimination against workers who care for family members with a chronic or disabling condition, but some states and local laws offer more protection to family caregivers,” Ansberry writes.

According to Cynthia Thomas Calvert, a senior adviser for the Center for WorkLife Law, workplace discrimination against employees who care for adult family members is an ever-increasing problem.

“We expect further growth as the population ages,” says Calvert, who also works with employers to support working caregivers. 

For Those at Smaller Employers, Few Good Options

The problem is arguably worse for those who work at smaller companies or nonprofits. Remote work is typically not an option, and they must rely on the goodwill of their employers.

Michigan resident Ollie Lewis, 47, manages a Volunteers of America Thrift Store, arriving at 8am in the morning and overseeing a team of 35 employees. But he is also a caregiver for his mom, who has had breast cancer and a stroke and was recently diagnosed with both Parkinson’s disease and dementia. Ollie—an only child—assumed this role after the death of his father eight years ago, and uses paid time off and lunch breaks to take his mom to appointments.

During a recent annual managers retreat, Ollie received a call that his mom was in the emergency room, unresponsive. He received sympathy and help from his district manager, who stepped in to care for the store. This support brings Ollie peace of mind, but his story is not always the norm.

Caregivers Plan to Leave Their Jobs, If They Can

“More than one-third of working caregivers said they plan to leave work primarily because of caregiving, according to a recent survey by AARP and S&P Global,” Ansberry writes. “Others can’t afford to forgo a paycheck, because of mortgages and college expenses, and push themselves to extremes. About half of employees who left a job because of caregiving were senior executives and leaders, according to a 2024 Harvard Business School report.”

There is a glimmer of hope on the horizon, though limited for now. While most companies have long offered maternity and paternity benefits to attract and retain their workers, some are starting to offer eldercare support, as well. According to a survey by Care.com, an online family-care platform, about half of employers said that senior benefits are a priority this year, up from 43 percent in 2023.

Ansberry writes, “Some companies allow employees to add their parents to their health insurance plans or connect them with care specialists. Citigroup recently announced two weeks of paid leave annually to care for an immediate family member. The most prized benefit, according to employee surveys, is flexibility.”

Rajiv’s Take: This Shouldn’t Come as a Surprise

We asked Rajiv for his views on this issue, and, as you might imagine, he had some strong reactions.

“Look, this is a tough topic,” he acknowledges. “I feel for these people who are caught between a rock and a hard place – working full time while providing care. It’s exhausting and frustrating!”

However, says Rajiv, this is something families have to plan for. “Anyone should know that, statistically, most seniors are going to need care at some point in life. Families have simply got to look down the road and start planning for that likelihood. With the right plan, your mom or dad can be covered by long term care insurance, or Medicaid, or VA benefits. With the right plan, your family can find a way to budget for in-home care. There are solutions.”

But, Rajiv emphasizes, “Without a plan, your family is heading for disaster.” His take-away: seek out the right professional advice. Start planning now. And come to a LifePlanning Seminar at the next opportunity. “We’ll help steer you down the right road,” Rajiv says.

Rajiv Nagaich – Your Retirement Planning Coach and Guide

The long-awaited book by Rajiv Nagaich, called Your Retirement: Dream or Disaster, has been released and is now available to the public. Retirement: Dream or Disaster joins Rajiv’s ground-breaking DVD series and workbook, Master Your Future, as a powerful planning tool in your retirement toolbox. As a friend of AgingOptions, we know you’ll want to get your copy and spread the word.

You’ve heard Rajiv say it repeatedly: 70 percent of retirement plans will fail. If you know someone whose retirement turned into a nightmare when they were forced into a nursing home, went broke paying for care, or became a burden to their families – and you want to make sure it doesn’t happen to you – then this book is must-read.

Through stories, examples, and personal insights, Rajiv takes us along on his journey of expanding awareness about a problem that few are willing to talk about, yet it’s one that results in millions of Americans sleepwalking their way into their worst nightmares about aging. Rajiv lays bare the shortcomings of traditional retirement planning advice, exposes the biases many professionals have about what is best for older adults, and much more.

Rajiv then offers a solution: LifePlanning, his groundbreaking approach to retirement planning. Rajiv explains the essential planning steps and, most importantly, how to develop the framework for these elements to work in concert toward your most deeply held retirement goals.

Your retirement can be the exciting and fulfilling life you’ve always wanted it to be. Start by reading and sharing Rajiv’s important message. And remember, Age On, everyone!

(originally reported at www.wsj.com)